Sanjip only dates women ranking above himself in the pharmaceutical industry.  He uses these women and sets them up with some blackmail type scenario. It all starts with courtliness and astounding attentiveness.  They feel they’ve discovered true love and a good man who loves the Lord.  Then it’s smutty texts, emails and photos he can use to intimidate and manipulate them into giving him introductions, recommendations, and even jobs.  He is an absolute maniac of ambition with no conscience.  Until other women he steps on speak out, he’s headed straight to the top.  I wonder where he came up with these tactics and how common they are.

-Palmera C.

Marcellus is a sports industry groupie.  Ever since he blew out his knee in college and ruined his chance to play pro ball, he’s been looking to make someone pay for his lost prospects. He just won’t date a woman who can’t further his interests in sports management.  He wants to go to the games, be seen, talk the talk and be an insider at any costs.  Nor will he date a woman who doesn’t keep him.  She needs to be high-powered & high-paid or no-go.  He’s also on the down-low with a fake wanna-be/ never-was career as an R&B singer.  He claims I won’t tell his latest victim, a high-ranking woman at the top of the food chain at the National Football League, because I need to use her for business purposes of my own.  Marcellus ain’t no dummy — he’s right.  I’ll never tell his secrets.

-Kyle L. G.


If a guy seems too wonderful, too perfect, too nice … well, he may be too good to be true. I’m really a terrible cynic but stories like these have women bracing themselves for the big reveal of Mr. Hyde that unsuits from within Dr. Jekyll’s skin.

It happens all too often that women are targets of insincere Romeos with their way to make in the world.  It’s one thing if your partner benefits from your willing help.  But it’s a calamity when you get close to the wrong one and he goes all out to 1.) make your life a nightmare and 2.) get all the material and social goods he can squeeze out of you against your will by twisting your arm.

I wish it meant something to know a guy’s friends or his family or where he went to school. But as we know our social circles are brimming with subtle or closet sociopaths who will step on and destroy anyone to pave their way to success.


Cut this dude off.  Take the embarrassment, take your lumps.  You’re a grown woman. Contact law enforcement if need be. Your relationship was based on lies and exploitation.

Heartless it may be, but headless it ain’t. I don’t claim to be nice or sentimental, just to be sensible.

If your man fits these criteria and exhibits these behaviors, for your own safety and mental health — he’s gotta go.



  1. Author Terry McMillan got in trouble marrying that social climber who gave her groove back. She said in NY magazine: “In March he left me a blackmail voice mail, and I filed a restraining order and the judge didn’t think it was warranted. Jonathan said three times, “Make me an offer and all of this can go away.” I wanted Jonathan to know, “Look at all this stuff I have on you — did I leak it to the media? No, I did not! All I want you to do is leave me alone.” I wanted to let him know that I wouldn’t stoop as low as he had. And I wanted the judge to know I was offended. They didn’t read my documents. I wouldn’t dream of lying in a court document. Jonathan told over 500 lies; I counted them.

    The essay is not meant to go together with the court documents. I wanted him to know about the things I’d figured out. Most men who do this are good at this, and I wanted him to know how when I rewound and thought about what happened, I’d figured it out. When you treat someone well and you love them, and when you didn’t do anything — it’s not about him being gay, I can’t stress that enough. It’s the lying. Years of lying. You feel like you married a lie. And I did marry a lie. And they expect me to feel sorry for him. He had no right, none whatsoever. None.”

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